


Hugh Gets Literary

by china_shop



Category: Canadian Actor RPF, Fandom RPF
Genre: Crack, Fic, M/M, Mary Sue, Meta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-10
Updated: 2008-03-10
Packaged: 2017-10-13 04:11:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/132685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/china_shop/pseuds/china_shop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Hugh slashes mergatrude and me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hugh Gets Literary

**Author's Note:**

> This follows on from [mergatrude's confession to Hugh and Callum about writing RPS](http://archiveofourown.org/works/132655).

Hugh and Callum arrive back at the party eventually, and everyone looks at them and drools with varying levels of discretion. They seem pretty cool with that, though -- I guess they're used to it. Hugh comes over and hands me a sheaf of typewritten papers, and then goes off to help himself to some cake. Callum mingles for a little while, giving people shy smiles and shaking their hands, and then gravitates back to Hugh again, and they go outside to smoke. Some of the party guests follow them and watch from a discreet distance, hoping they'll make out. The rest of us are unwilling to stray that far from the amazingly yummy snacks Turnbull has provided (thus redeeming himself from his earlier faux pas).

I look at the paper Hugh gave me. It starts:  


> china shop pushes her redhair off her face adn pushes her glassess up and whispers lets do it, baby. ok saya mergatrud im ready anytime u are.

  
I blink, and go and find you talking to Sage. "Um," I say, turning red. "I think Hugh made good on his threat."

"Which one?" you ask.

"You know how he said how would we like it if he wrote slash about us?" I wave the papers in your face. "Well, I think he did."

You laugh, disbelievingly. "No way."

I just nod. You snatch the papers out of my hand and start reading them aloud. "'China Shop and Mergatrude were hard up for cash--'"

"Oh my god!" I say. "He filked us! That's-- beyond the pale! Hilarious! I don't even know what that is." I run my hands through my hair distractedly and try to read over your shoulder.

Sage dissolves into giggles. "Read the next bit!"

I'm torn between Shhhhh! Keep your voice down! and doing a public reading of it to share the joke.

Brynn comes over to say hi, and I get distracted greeting her excitedly, since it's the first time we've properly met! "HI!"

"What's going on?" she asks. "Did Hugh give you those?"

"Yes," I say, evasively. "You know, he's here if you want to stalk him." I point toward the stage where Hugh's now talking to the karaoke sound technicians. Callum's still outside being mobbed by fangirls.

"Can I see?" Brynn asks mergatrude.

mergatrude hands it over. "'They stayed up all night eating each other's--"

"Oh god," I say, and bury my head in my hands.

"Now you know how they feel," says Sage, between giggles.

"Shut up or I'm going to freak out. This is just--" I glance at you, and we both turn bright red. "Really fucking weird."

"I love the punctuation," says Brynn. "Look -- he actually used apostrophes here."

I, uh, snatch the pages from her hand and fold them up. "I think I need to be a lot drunker before I can read this," I say firmly. "Or before anyone else can read this. Okay? We'll just save it for later."

You (still red-faced) and Sage and Brynn look at me reproachfully.

"What? It's different, okay? It's--" I wave my hand in the air to illustrate. "--different," I finish lamely.

"Uh-huh," says Brynn.

"mergatrude and I are just friends--" I trail off.

"Uh-huh," says Sage.

"No, really," I say, scrambling for some moral high ground. "It's. Different." I grasp blindly for a reason. "Because. We're more real than they are."

"Uh-huh," say Brynn and Sage in unison.

"If you say so," you say, faux indulgently. Traitor!

"Fine," I say and hand over the pages. "I'll just be in the corner there with my hands over my ears, singing something wholesome and innocent, la la la la la, like the rubber ducky song." I break off, abruptly. "Uh. Or something else. Innocent. Whatever." I am _dying_. My face feels like it could power a small city.

You're laughing at me, and I catch your eye and then burst out laughing too. "Okay," I say. "Fine." I cover my face while I struggle for composure. "What does it say next?"


End file.
